Can I do anything to bring the mind, heart and action in harmony? Is there a solution to the uneasiness in life? This is a continuation of the previous post – https://never-not-now.com/2019/07/14/uneasiness-in-life/.
This is a post in which I will think aloud because I don’t know the answer.
- The root cause of the uneasiness in life is the disharmony among mind, heart and action.
- The root cause of the disharmony is fear. Fear can be of anything – life, spiders, loss of job, loss of reputation, loss of a pen, loss of parents, loss of love, loss of child, loss of partner, public speaking (loss of reputation), et al.
- The root cause of fear is attachment.
- The root cause of attachment is desire.
As long as you have desire, there will be attachment. As long as there is attachment, there will be fear. As long as there is fear, there will be confusion. When there is confusion, there is uneasiness.
So, what does one do? Probably you can’t do anything. It is like ‘I’ trying to improve ‘me’. ‘I’ telling ‘me’ that ‘me’ is not good enough, ‘me’ needs improvement; ‘me’ in turn standing its ground. And hence the conflict. Let’s say ‘I’ gets heavier this time and is able to do something about ‘me’. What does the world tell us about the possible solutions?
- Sedatives; anti-depressants.
- Working towards one big worldly goal.
- Leading a simple life.
- Knowing the unity of it all and living a life accordingly.
1. Sedatives; anti-depressants. You go to psychiatrists and doctors with the symptoms of depression and you will get prescription sedatives and anti-depressants. These work until these don’t. A few of these help calm down the mind by making you sleep. Others help by secreting happy hormones but with time you need higher dosage of these medicines to get the same effect, and you become dependent on these. A point comes when these stop working. But at least these provide some temporary relief to folks whose mind has been constantly racing thinking about the same set of thoughts over and over again.
2. Working towards one big worldly goal. A lucky few know what really they are about. These people pursue their goal at the cost of everything else. To one outsider, he/she may not seem to be a happy person but he/she is at ease even if he doesn’t have close family, or if he needs to commit a crime. One cannot try to become like these people; they just are; even they don’t know why they are how they are. Many people do research on them and write self-help books. And we buy those to no very little effect.
4. Knowing the unity of it all and living a life accordingly. Every section of the society boasts of a rare few who claim that it’s all one. These people come in different shapes and sizes – a few are rich, a few are poor, a few are monks or nuns and a few are householders. These people are full of love and compassion but their claim of oneness seems to be bizarre and is hard to believe especially when we clearly sees plurality and opposites everywhere. Moreover, they are very rare, say, one in a 100 million at any given time. People have tried to copy them, read about them, can speak eloquently for hours about how to lead a life like them but their own lives do not reflect what they preach. So, we will also leave this one out.
3. Leading a simple life. I think here in lies the answer for someone like me. ‘I’ may not be able to improve ‘me’ but ‘I’ won’t stop trying even if it might be a futile exercise but who knows (hope) something may come out of it, and ‘I’ and ‘me’ are not at conflict. If you understand your own nature and have a few simple rules (not commandments; nothing is sacrosanct), then there may be a possibility of aligning the mind, heart and action.
The rules –
- Always speak the truth. Always. But be gentle. You don’t have to be radical in your approach and go about hurting everyone around. Material gain can be compromised but not this rule.
- Do not harm anyone – physically or emotionally. Try to do it as far as possible. This rule extends to yourself. Don’t harm others or yourself. Material gain can be compromised but not this rule.
- Do not take what is not yours. If you don’t think you deserve something, politely say no.
- Enough is ok. You don’t need ‘more’. Define your ‘enough’ at the outset. More is not looked down upon but not needed. If any of these rules get compromised, pack up.
- Lead a simple sexual life – again whatever you deem fit is your ‘right’ sexual life. It would mostly depend upon the time and place you are in. A complicated sexual life complicates everything. And for a man, so much of energy is lost thinking about it.
I guess if one knows and follows these rules, life will become easier. In case of confusion, you can fall back on these rules. Remember these are not ‘God’ given rules; these are not nature’s rules. Consider these to be thumb rules, following which you maybe able to bring in clarity when you are indecisive. For someone like me, it’s not possible to get rid of all desires and so I can’t get rid of my attachments (to people, things, status, etc.). But I can try to bring some clarity in life so that I do what my mind tells and my heart concurs.
Be consistent in applying these rules. You will start respecting yourself and others will too. Others might find it a little awkward if you plan to change your lifestyle in which you can apply these rules all the time but they will eventually come around. Consistency is the key.
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